Former President George W. Bush was unexpectedly named the WNBA’s first Honorary Commissioner during the Dallas Wings’ home opener. The 43rd president told reporters, “After the White House, I figured I’d finally take a job where the plays are actually bipartisan,” while sporting a personalized “Dubya for Three” jersey. Bush’s longtime support of women’s sports and his well-known 2023 appearance at a Wings game, in which he enthusiastically displayed his free-throw form, were cited by the league as inspiration for the position.

Bush’s responsibilities will include advocating for increased media coverage, giving ceremonial tip-offs, and creating a unique “Freedom Ball” for the 2024 All-Star Game, which pays homage to his painting hobby. He joked during the press conference, “I promise no hanging chads on the scoreboard,” before participating in an unplanned three-point shootout with Wings players (sources confirm he went 1-for-10).

Bush’s appointment is expected to strengthen the WNBA’s position on gender equality in sports. The former president gave his supporters his trademark Bushism as he walked out of the court: “Fool me once… shame on you.” Let’s just say that these women are not fooled at all. Fool me twice. Next week marks the start of the league’s season, and nobody anticipated the unexpected presidential endorsement.